Wife's gift of a kidney further unites couple

By Jon Frank, The Virginian-Pilot

December 27, 2005

Anita Rowland of Virginia Beach gave husband, Mike, one of her kidneys three months ago. Mike Rowland was born with only one kidney, just like his mother and oldest daughter. VICKI CRONIS/THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT

VIRGINIA BEACH -- For Anita and Mike Rowland, Christmas season carries a deeper and more profound message of gift-giving this year than in years past.

Three months ago, Anita donated a kidney to her husband, freeing him from the dialysis machine and probably extending his life.

The organ gift brought the couple and their three children closer than ever, figuratively and literally.

"You know when you take your wedding vows and they say that you are joined until death?" said Mike Rowland, a bail bondsman who works mostly at the Virginia Beach courthouse. "Well, now we really are joined together. We are each other."

It is the kind of organ donation that used to be rare. But 51 years after the first kidney was transplanted by Massachusetts surgeon Joseph E. Murray, spouse-to-spouse donations are now almost routine at clinics such as Sentara Norfolk General Hospital's Transplant Center.

ORGAN DONATIONS

Nationally, about 90,000 people are on the organ list awaiting transplants. About 70 percent of those are waiting on a kidney.

In Virginia, there are 2,350 people waiting for an organ transplant. About 1,795 are waiting for a kidney. The average waiting period for a deceased donation is four to six years. Three Virginians die each week waiting for an organ that never comes.

Better anti-rejection medications and improved surgical techniques that often leave only tiny scars on donors' bodies have combined to make the surgery a procedure that can save lives and free patients from dialysis, said Betty Crandall, director of the Sentara center.

This year, Crandall said, there have been 16 spouse-to-spouse donations out of 66 living donor transplants at Norfolk General. There have been 92 kidney transplants overall, with several more possible before the end of the year.

Spouse-to-spouse donations are "more usual than you would think," said Lou Markwith, chief executive officer of the National Kidney Foundation of the Virginias.

Markwith cited comedian George Lopez as a well-known kidney recipient who received his transplanted organ from his wife.

Nationwide, in 2004 there were 7,004 living kidney donors -- people who gave up an organ.

For the past three years, living kidney donors have outnumbered deceased donors, making a living donation not only easier and more convenient for the recipient, but also one that has a greater chance of success.

"It is wonderful to see that," said Dena Reynolds, spokeswoman for LifeNet, the nonprofit agency based in Virginia Beach that coordinates organ and tissue donations.

LifeNet is contacted after every Virginia death. If the LifeNet database identifies the deceased as an organ donor, the recovery process is started immediately. Seven life-giving organs -- heart, liver, pancreas, two kidneys and two lungs -- are removed, along with ligaments and other tissues, Reynolds said.

But there remains a critical shortage of organs. About 90,000 people across the nation are on the organ list awaiting transplants, she said. About 70 percent of those are waiting on a kidney, according to the National Kidney Foundation.

In Virginia, there are 2,350 people waiting for an organ transplant. About 1,795 are waiting for a kidney.

Reynolds said the average wait for a deceased donation is four to six years. Three Virginians die each week waiting for an organ that never comes, she said.

Living donors, however, are making those statistics shrink.

Today, a living kidney donor can have an organ removed and be back at work within a week.

But that wasn't the motivation for Anita Rowland. "I just really love him and want to keep him around," she said of her husband. "Alive is good."

Kidney disease is not new to the Rowlands

Two of Anita's four children had a form of kidney disease. One, a daughter, died soon after birth. The other, Amy, is now 19 and healthy after struggling with her condition during her early youth.

Mike's 58-year-old mother, Laura Sawyer, received a kidney transplant three years ago from a deceased donor. It freed her after seven years of dialysis.

That transplant was, in part, necessary because she was born with only one kidney, a family trait that both Mike and his daughter, Amy, share.

Mike was almost 43 before he knew that he had only one kidney.

Doctors discovered a kidney malfunction after Anita signed him up for a blood pressure screening. That led to an MRI, which revealed the missing kidney.

By that time, Mike was going into renal failure, without any symptoms that he identified as disease markers. Only his itchy legs at night gave any clue to what was ailing him.

His kidney function deteriorated from about 25 percent to 15 percent in less than a year. He started dialysis in 2004.

Eventually, the treatment required that Mike hook himself to the dialysis machine for eight hours every night. The treatments were both inconvenient and drained him of energy.

That's when Anita stepped up.

"We had already lost a daughter, and I didn't want to turn around and lose a husband," Anita said.

She had seen Mike's mother suffer through seven years of dialysis while waiting for an organ. She had offered to give her mother-in-law one of her own kidneys but was persuaded against it because of her daughter's condition and the possibility that she might need a donation one day.

When her husband began to get ill, Anita decided it was time to act.

"I'd seen what his mom went through, and I didn't want Mike to go through that," she said. "I was going to give one of my kidneys even if we weren't a match, so he could move up on the list."

Initial tests showed that while their blood types were both A-positive, the two were not a match on key antigen tests. But they were close enough, and doctors considered the risk minimal.

Surgery was scheduled for March.

Days before the surgery, however, the Rowlands were hit by a financial bombshell.

To afford the expensive anti-rejection medication required after surgery, Mike would have to pay out of pocket for six months before a newly acquired supplemental insurance policy kicked in. At $4,000 a month, the cost would have financially broken the family.

The only alternative was to postpone surgery for six months.

The prospect of such a long delay was daunting. But they had almost no choice. "I was devastated," Anita said. "We had gotten so close and then it was snatched away."

Mike had to return to dialysis. "It was like my whole life revolved around these exchanges," Mike said.

Meanwhile, Anita went back to the calendar, marking off days until Sept. 13, the new surgery date and, coincidentally, the anniversary of their daughter's birth and death.

When the day arrived, the Rowlands were driven to Norfolk General by Amy at 4:30 a.m. "She really became the parent," Anita said. "She was calm and cool the whole time."

Both were rolled into surgery at about the same time. Anita"s procedure started first, with the left kidney loosened in preparation for transplantation. Then Mike was opened and prepared to receive his wife's organ.

By 3 p.m., Mike was awake in the recovery room. A week later, he was home.

Almost immediately, Anita's kidney -- nicknamed by the Rowlands as "Kidney Bean" -- began producing urine, proof that it was working.

"Pinto Bean," the kidney that Anita kept, also is working fine. She was feeling completely healthy a week after the surgery.

For Mike, the recovery process has been a little slower.

Except for a handful of anti-rejection drugs he takes twice a day, Mike's life has now -- three months later -- returned to normal.

"I have never felt better," Mike said. "I look on it as a totally new lease on life."

For the first time in years, Anita has a healthy husband. And there is a bonus to her organ gift. "If I ever need a kidney," she said, "I move to the head of the list because I donated."

The experience has been one of deliverance, Mike said.

"It is the kind of thing that either breaks you or makes you," he said. "For us, it made us stronger."

Reach Jon Frank at (757) 222-5122 or jon.frank@pilotonline.com.

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This article posted January 22, 2006.